Topic: Best Ways to Annoy Your Upstairs Neighbors Into Being Quieter
If you live in an apartment building or other multi-family dwelling, there’s no doubt that you’ve experienced the joy of having neighbors who play music, watch movies, and generally make noise late into the night and early in the morning.
You could try talking to them politely or even going to the landlord, but your efforts are likely to fall on deaf ears — literally. In order to get your neighbors to be quieter without resorting to violence, start by following these 10 ways to annoy your upstairs neighbors into being quieter!
Turn on your sink faucet
One of my favorite ways to annoy your upstairs neighbors is by turning on your sink faucet full blast. This will get them wondering if you’re doing some early morning plumbing work or had a pipe burst. It’s a great way to make sure they know you want them to keep it down.
Just be careful, because sometimes when water starts going in their ceiling, they call maintenance and have you evicted. So… good luck with that one! I don’t think I would recommend it, especially since you could cause damage to their property.
Run the vacuum cleaner
This is a classic. When your upstairs neighbors are making too much noise and you can’t bear it any longer, just crank up your vacuum cleaner.
Most people find vacuuming unbearable, so they’ll tiptoe around as soon as they hear that dreaded whirring sound.
If you don’t have a vacuum handy, try turning on some music or cranking up your TV instead. If all else fails and your upstairs neighbors still won’t keep quiet, there are always more extreme measures…
Sing as Loudly as Possible
If you’re like most people, there is a time in your life when you were enamored with singing. You practiced songs, tested out new voices, and maybe even learned how to read music.
Somewhere along your journey, however, that love of music started losing steam as responsibilities crept up on you.
And now you find yourself living with neighbors who enjoy waking you up in their pursuit of musical stardom.
The best way to fight back? Be louder than they are! It’s easy enough to do if you put some work into it—and it can be incredibly effective at getting them to tone down their performances.
All you need is a little volume—and some inspiration from these ten ways to annoy your upstairs neighbors into being quieter
Move Things Around All Day Long
One way to annoy your upstairs neighbors is by constantly moving things around. Every day at a different time, rearrange everything in your home so it’s not where it was that morning—and they’ll never know when you’re actually doing work.
No one likes a noisy neighbor, so make sure they can never get too comfortable in their lives next door to you! You might even consider asking them over for dinner or drinks every once in a while just to keep them on their toes. If you play your cards right, they won’t have any idea what hit them.
Put on an Alarm Clock and Set it Off Regularly
Make your neighbors think you have a strict bedtime with an alarm clock set to go off hourly between 8 p.m. and midnight. And then, instead of turning it off like a normal person would do, keep hitting snooze until it’s too late for them to complain about noise again that night. Voilà—quiet upstairs neighbors! (Just make sure they don’t catch on.)
Crack Open Every Window in your House at Once
If your neighbors are making too much noise, open every window in your house and turn on a fan. The fan will cover up some of their noise while also blowing air around in a way that creates white noise.
In most cases, they’ll stop whatever they’re doing immediately because it sounds like there’s a hurricane outside! If you want to go one step further, put out candles for an authentic hurricane candlelit dinner effect.
They’ll definitely be annoyed at first, but when they realize it was just you messing with them, they’ll appreciate how funny you are.
Play a Cacophony of Musical Instruments
If you’re worried about your loud air conditioner bothering your neighbors, you may want to try cranking up a cacophony of instruments while you use it.
The sound of a guitar and drums or another group of instruments playing in harmony can be enough to cover up any noise your air conditioner makes.
Make sure your upstairs neighbors will appreciate the music and don’t get too annoyed by it before proceeding with caution.
Stir Up Something Smelly
If you’re looking for a surefire way to annoy your upstairs neighbors, try cooking something fishy or otherwise pungent.
If they can smell it coming out of your kitchen, they’ll feel like their right to enjoy their home is being infringed upon—and they might be inclined to tell you so.
Cooking something with a strong scent may not have any effect on you, but it could make your neighbors squirm in their own home.
Place The Speakers Against The Ceiling
Simply setting speakers up on opposite sides of a room can help create a surround-sound effect that makes audio appear to be coming from a particular direction.
That’s helpful when you want people upstairs to be sure they’re hearing your music, not theirs. If they’re listening to Led Zeppelin, you want them downstairs! In an apartment or condo, though, you might have to ask permission before mounting speakers—or maybe just wait until after 9 p.m., when most leases prohibit loud noise.
You could also just talk louder and try to convince your neighbors that they’re imagining things if they think it sounds like AC/DC is blasting through their ceiling at midnight. It will all work out in the end!
Put Some Oil in Their Doorknobs
Believe it or not, oiling up a doorknob with WD-40 will make it really difficult for your neighbors to turn their door knob.
And when they can’t turn their door knob, they have no choice but to knock on your door and ask you for help.
That’s right—you hold all of the power in this situation because you can choose whether or not to give them help opening their own damn door!
You might want to use a vibration machine for the ceiling or a loudspeaker
The best solution for upstairs neighbors who are too loud is to get them out of your apartment. The next best option? Get them out of your mind! Set up a device that lets you take your anger and frustration out on them by physically vibrating or thumping against their ceiling. If it gets too annoying, they’ll hopefully turn down their music…or pack up and move away.
Before You Implement Above Mentioned nuclear options
Before you go on a mission to annoy your neighbors, try a few of these less risky methods first. Keep in mind, it’s never fun having to get off of your couch and go next door to request that they stop doing whatever annoying thing they’re doing; but if you can catch them in time and let them know what’s bugging you—before it gets out of hand—you might be able to resolve things amicably.
Speak with your neighbors
Sometimes, we want our neighbors to be quiet and sometimes, we’re just not in a position to ask them nicely. So, what do you do? Just go knock on their door (in person) and tell them they are being too loud.
This is an easy way to resolve your issues in an adult way that will benefit both parties involved. Be polite but firm when talking with your neighbors—being polite will show that you’re trying to work things out and being firm shows that you mean business.
Confirm/Document/Record The Noise
It’s not uncommon for upstairs neighbors (and apartment building owners) to use recordings of normal everyday noises as proof that your children or pets are making too much noise.
Take time every week or so to record a five-minute video of peace and quiet—there’s nothing more annoying than an empty house. Of course, you should document all of your complaints in writing.
Become familiar with local noise ordinances
If you’re living in an apartment, chances are there are some noise ordinance laws. It is your right to ask that your neighbors respect these laws, and not be such a nuisance at 2:00 am on a Thursday morning with their god awful music.
If they refuse then file a complaint with your local law enforcement agency. THERE ARE NO EXCUSES FOR BEING A DISRUPTIVE NEIGHBOR!
Consult The Landlord TO MEDIATE
If you don’t feel comfortable knocking on your neighbors’ door yourself, a building manager or landlord can politely knock for you. The trick is to find out who owns and/or manages your building first—otherwise, you might get in trouble.
Then ask that person if there’s a better time of day when people are less likely to be home so you can talk with them about how they can keep their noise levels down.
You could also write an anonymous note detailing your complaints and leave it at their door; just make sure you address it to the upstairs neighbors instead of specifically mentioning names.
Just know that mediation probably won’t work unless both parties are willing to listen and compromise. (And even then, it may not.) You may have to consider more drastic measures if nothing changes after repeated attempts at diplomacy.
Eventually , If All Fails, Implement Soundproofing Measures In The Ceiling
Now, if your upstairs neighbors are being loud enough that you hear them through your ceiling, obviously there’s not much you can do in terms of negotiating with them (as they’re likely too busy blasting their music).
That said, if all else fails (and you just can’t stand it anymore), try implementing some ceiling soundproofing methods to help block out some of that noise and make your living experience a bit more relaxing. We already covered How to Soundproof a Ceiling Topic, feel free to check that out